mannafest.faith

Life questions

Parenting

Raising children in the training of the Lord.

We must sing of God's mercies as long as we live, train up others to sing of them when we are gone, and hope to be singing them in heaven world without end; and this is singing of the mercies of the Lord for ever.
Matthew Henry, Commentary on the Whole Bible (1710)
In this passage, he teaches him the art of educating. And well he might, for it was through Moses, in fact, that the Lord of the ancient people was the educator of his children. It is in his own person, however, face to face, that he is the guide of the new people.
Clement of Alexandria, The Instructor Book 1 (215)
The necessity of an early religious education is inculcated through the whole oracles of God. The parents who neglect it have an awful account to give to the Judge of quick and dead.
Adam Clarke, Commentary on the Bible (1832)

Scripture opens with parents. Adam and Eve name their children, watch one son kill another, and grieve. From the very first family, the Bible is honest that raising children is not simple, even in a world barely a generation old (Genesis 4:1-8).

God speaks of Abraham in a striking way before Isaac is even born: he chooses him because he knows Abraham will command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD (Genesis 18:19). Parenting, in other words, was never just about food and shelter. It was about handing down the knowledge of God himself.

That charge becomes explicit at Sinai. Moses tells Israel to keep God's words in their own hearts first, and then teach them diligently to their children — talking about them at home, on the road, lying down, and rising up (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). The generations were never meant to drift apart from the faith. Each one was responsible to hand the next one the same living knowledge of God it had received.

The Psalms make the same commitment into a song. One generation tells the next what the LORD has done, so that no child grows up not knowing (Psalm 78:4-6). Children themselves are called a heritage from the LORD, not a burden to be managed but a gift to be received (Psalm 127:3).

Proverbs is the most practical book in Scripture on raising children, and it does not flinch from the subject of correction. It links real love for a son to a willingness to discipline him, and promises that training a child in the way he should go will not be forgotten even when he is old (Proverbs 13:24; 22:6). It also promises the other side of that coin — that correcting a son brings the parent rest, not only struggle (Proverbs 29:17).

The New Testament turns the same instruction around and speaks just as directly to parents. Paul tells fathers not to provoke their children to wrath, but to bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). He repeats the warning to the Colossians almost word for word — do not provoke your children, or they will lose heart (Colossians 3:21). Correction and love, in Paul's mind, were never opposites. A father who never corrects and a father who only provokes have both failed the same test.

Jesus himself was once a child under parents. Luke records, almost in passing, that after being found in the temple he went down to Nazareth and was subject to Mary and Joseph (Luke 2:51). The Son of God grew up obedient inside an ordinary human family, under ordinary human parents, before he ever taught a crowd or worked a miracle.

Behind every human parent stands the pattern of God's own fatherhood. Hebrews compares his discipline of believers directly to a father correcting a son he loves, arguing that a father who never corrects his child is not caring for him but neglecting him (Hebrews 12:5-11). The aim was never punishment for its own sake, but a child shaped into someone who can be trusted with what matters.

John captures the reward at the far end of all this labor in a single line: he has no greater joy than to hear that his children are walking in the truth (3 John 1:4). That, more than any method or rule, is what parenting in Scripture is finally aimed at — not children who simply obey, but children who grow up to know and love the same God their parents did.

Read in full, not just cited

The 3 verses the essay above leans on hardest

And Adam had relations with his wife Eve, and she conceived and gave birth to Cain. “With the help of the LORD I have brought forth a man,” she said.
Genesis 4:1BSB
For I have chosen him, so that he will command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, in order that the LORD may bring upon Abraham what He has promised.”
Genesis 18:19BSB
These words I am commanding you today are to be upon your hearts.
Deuteronomy 6:6BSB

13 passages

Where Scripture speaks

For I have chosen him, so that he will command his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just, in order that the LORD may bring upon Abraham what He has promised.”
Genesis 18:19BSB

God chooses Abraham because he will command his children to keep the LORD's way

And you shall teach them diligently to your children and speak of them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.
Deuteronomy 6:7BSB

The Shema commands teaching God's words diligently to children, all day long

We will not hide them from their children, but will declare to the next generation the praises of the LORD and His might, and the wonders He has performed.
Psalms 78:4BSB

The psalm commits to telling the next generation what the LORD has done

Children are indeed a heritage from the LORD, and the fruit of the womb is His reward.
Psalms 127:3BSB

Children are named a heritage from the LORD, not a burden but a reward

He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
Proverbs 13:24BSB

Proverbs ties real love for a son to willingness to correct him

Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it.
Proverbs 22:6BSB

The classic charge: train up a child in the way he should go

Discipline your son, and he will give you rest; he will bring delight to your soul.
Proverbs 29:17BSB

Correcting a son is promised to bring the parent rest and delight

Then He went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But His mother treasured up all these things in her heart.
Luke 2:51BSB

Even the boy Jesus is shown subject to his earthly parents at Nazareth

Fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath; instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:4BSB

Fathers are warned not to provoke children to wrath, but to raise them in the Lord

Fathers, do not provoke your children, so they will not become discouraged.
Colossians 3:21BSB

Paul repeats the warning: do not provoke children, lest they lose heart

An overseer must manage his own household well and keep his children under control, with complete dignity.
1 Timothy 3:4BSB

A leader's fitness is tested partly by how he manages his own children

Endure suffering as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?
Hebrews 12:7BSB

Hebrews likens God's discipline of believers to a father correcting a son

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.
3 John 1:4BSB

John names no greater joy than hearing his spiritual children walk in truth

Life questions